Conflict management is a critical skill in business. How one handles tense encounters can affect the outcome. Learn more about your own reactions in stressful situations with this questionnaire. Simply read the questions and mark the response which is most like you, then tally your results at the end.
1- If someone yells at me at work, it is most like me to:
- a) Yell back.
- b) Pout.
- c) Give them a dirty look and curse under my breath.
- d) Explain to them that I want to work with them but I will not tolerate yelling.
2- If I feel upset about something at work, it is most like me to:
- a) Go home and kick the dog or cat.
- b) Go home and cry.
- c) Go to the bar and have several drinks.
- d) Find someone I can trust to talk to about the issues.
3- When I am angry I almost always:
- a) Break something.
- b) Feel depressed.
- c) Treat everyone around me hatefully.
- d) Pray, meditate and work towards getting into a serene state of mind.
4- If I feel verbally attacked by another person, I will:
- a) Attack back.
- b) Ignore the person.
- c) Tell everyone about the attack.
- d) Explain to the other person I feel attacked.
5- It is important for me in a conflict to:
- a) Have the upper hand.
- b) Feel safe.
- c) Be the victim.
- d) Understand why it is occurring.
6- The song lyric that best describes the way I feel about conflict is:
- a) These boots were made for walking.
- b) Make the world go away, take it off of my shoulders.
- c) Baby hit me one more time.
- d) We can work it out.
7- When it comes to conflict it seems like:
- a) I am always fighting with someone I know.
- b) I avoid conflict at all costs.
- c) Someone is always fighting with me.
- d) I handle conflict in a positive manner.
8- If I feel threatened by someone at work I will:
- a) Respond with a sarcastic remark.
- b) Be upset the rest of the day.
- c) Say something hateful about the person to others in the office or go out for a cigarette break.
- d) Ask the person for clarification and analyze why I feel threatened.
9- When people around me get into a conflict that does not involve me I tend to:
- a) Take a side and become a part of the conflict
- b) Feel anxious, nervous and/or upset
- c) Egg both parties on—drama is so exciting.
- d) Mind my own business and refuse to be drawn into the conflict.
10- If I feel angry I might:
- a) Drive fast and recklessly.
- b) Eat a bag of cookies or potato chips.
- c) Smoke cigarettes or drink excessively.
- d) Take a hot bath or go for a good workout.
11- When I am embroiled in conflict I:
- a) Can become abusive.
- b) Ban become withdrawn.
- c) Can attempt to control it.
- d) Can work to resolve it.
12- Unresolved conflicts mostly will affect:
- a) My work.
- b) My sleep.
- c) My eating.
- d) Possibly all of the above—I can at times put it out of my mind.
13- As a small I child I learned:
- a) That anger was acted out upon others
- b) To never show anger
- c) That anger was a negative or bad emotion
- d) That anger was a normal emotion and that you should work your anger out by talking or doing something constructive
Count the number of each letter you have circled.
A_______ B_______ C _______ D _______
The more “D”s you have circled show a greater ability to handle anger in a more healthy, productive and positive manner.
- A) Aggressive B) Passive C) Passive Aggressive D) Assertive